Elvis at 75:Infomercial Pitchman?
The King was born 75 years ago today in Tupelo, Mississippi. This milestone anniversary inspires a lot of us to contemplate what Elvis would be doing today if he were still alive. (Or if he hadn't escaped the limelight in 1977 to run a 7-11 in Saginaw).
I suppose there's a chance he could still have a lucrative night club show in Vegas, but I figure there are better odds that he'd be a fixture on late night infomercials.
And I've got some ideas about what he might be promoting.
The Elvis Presley Online School of Karate, Judo, and Hip Shakin' Goodness: Learn to defend yourself and look cool at the same time! All in the privacy of your own home. Study program includes 12 How-To DVD's, plus the bonus DVD, "A Change of Habit," starring Elvis and Mary Tyler Moore.
The Elvis Presley Home Drug Detection Kit: Think your kids are doing drugs? Find out for sure with this kit, endorsed by Elvis, who was an official narcotics task force member, appointed by President Nixon!
The Elvis Presley Peanut Butter and Banana Panini Press: Who cares if it has 50 grams of fat and more than 2,000 calories? It's Elvis baby! Plus "panini" sounds so much more impressive than "sandwich."